Episode 6

Revenge Sex and a Brown Paper Bag

"Revenge is mine!" sayeth the Lord. Revenge may look cool and might seem like a good idea in the movies when the hero goes for broke to even the odds. But that’s the movies. In real life, not so much. Revenge sex (not to be confused with make-up sex) is an even worse idea. But that doesn’t stop me. Mad, sad, disappointed, upset, and completely knocked off my game thanks to the events of Episode 5, A New Orleans Ghost Story, revenge is on my mind. But revenge doesn't accomplish much.


(00:14) Act 1: Acting out of Anger and Living in Echo Chambers

  • Stuck in someone else's pain
  • Why revenge doesn't work
  • Mistakes versus evil and why your pain doesn't make you special

(06:54) Act 2: Revenge and Its Various Forms

  • How revenge plays out in emotional matters
  • Why you need to be honest with your accountability tribe no matter what
  • Why revenge is a waste of time
  • Who actually suffers when you seek revenge

(17:24) Act 3: Revenge Sex - Setting the Trap and Creating the Bait

  • There was really no way for this to end well, but at the time, I simply did not care.


Resources from the Episode : 

You are NOT Your Past and don’t let anyone tell you otherwise: https://epayne.me/podmerch

Sign up for episode recaps from me, dating Q&As, access to exclusive merch, and more: http://patreon.com/ericpayne

Get control of YOUR time. It’s your most precious asset: https://epayne.me/self-care

Learn your worth. Speak your worth! https://gumroad.com/l/MinpA

Get poems featured in Season 3 here: http://epayne.me/poetrybook

Episode music by Epik The Dawn and Temper Beats


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About The Dating After Divorce Survival Guide

Datin' ain't easy — especially the second time around. Join retired blogger (MakesMeWannaHoller.com) and divorced dad, Eric Payne, for his humorous storytelling escapades that take you along for the ride over and through emotional hills and valleys as he navigates dating life as a divorced man. Eric doesn't shy away from any of it – the good, the bad, the ugly, and the messy, and he isn't afraid to call himself out when he's the one being messy. 

About the Podcast

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The Dating After Divorce Survival Guide
The Dating After Divorce Survival Guide is a serial podcast that thoughtfully and hilariously narrates the journey of fatherhood blogger Eric Payne as he navigates the challenges of "starting over" after divorce.

About your host

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Eric Payne

I got divorced in 2015. Afterward, I wandered around a lost, emotional mess. Men have feelings too! I created The Dating After Divorce Survival Guide to provide a path to emotional well-being that I never received and to tell the truth — men are just as scared as women (maybe more) when it comes to rejection and failing at love. But like me, if you're willing to dig deep, work hard on yourself, and not play the blame game you can turn divorce into a springboard to discover yourself, discover joy, and maybe find love again or maybe for the first time.

I'm Chicago-born, New York City-bred, and currently residing in Atlanta. A marketing and advertising guy most of my adult life, a writer since the second grade, and a storyteller since before even then, I've published two books of poetry, a parenting book, and the groundbreaking fatherhood and marriage blog, MakesMeWannaHoller.com. I have no problem laughing at myself and sharing the lessons my failures have taught me. I believe in superheroes, practice gratitude every chance I get and annoy my kids by being a super-loving father.